Steve Barkley: The Basketball Legend
by Mr. Cheese's Cousin
Summary: Steve joins a basketball team, and Roger trains him.


**DISCLAIMER! READ IT PLS!:** _American Dad!_ belongs to Seth MacFarlane, Matt Weizman, 20th Century Fox, and TBS. This story you're about to read is fair use! With that said, enjoy.

_Steve Barkley: The Basketball Legend_  
>Chapter 1: Steve Joining<p>

In Pearl Bailey High School, at the cafeteria, Steve and his friends, Snot, Barry, and Toshi, were having a conversation on who would win in a cat fight (Scarlett Johannson or Carly Rae Jespen). Obviously they chose Scarlett, since they were talking about the ass part... and Carly had no ass. Then, a basketball player from the school, named Brock Lanston, who was the #1 basketball player in the school, appears, but with a cast. "Hey Steve," said Brock, "are you guys have a chat?" "Oh, uh, I don't want any trouble. Here, I'll give you back my 3DS." Steve panicly said. "It's okay, it's okay, I'm not worried about it. My dog farted on it the other day." Steve looked confused. "Oh, Steve, I'm just messing around! Listen, I was talking to Principal Lewis that I'm done playing basketball this season due to bad injuries, so I was wondering if you can replace me." Steve looked even more confused. "What do you mean?" Steve muttered. "Well," Brock explained, "Principal Lewis said you were qualified, and you were good at basketball. Um, did he? No?" Steve didn't understand that at all, so he talked to Principal Lewis.

"So Principal Lewis," said Steve, in the Principal's office, "did Brock tell you that I'm qualified to be in the team?" It appears as if Lewis was sleeping. "Oh, Charlie, you are indeed a member of the Banana Republic." muttered Lewis in his sleep. "Something's not right." said Steve. So he explains to Brock that Principal Lewis was sleeping all this time, and was muttering that he was qualified. But Brock told him that he wasn't asleep; he drugged himself.

At home, as Stan comes home from work, Steve asks him if he can teach him how to play basketball, even though he wasn't sure if he's qualified. "Steve, I would love to," said Stan, "go upstairs and have a handjob so that I could forget about what you were saying." Hayley then comes downstairs and talks to him about basketball. "Steve," said Hayley, "I could actually be qualified." "But I haven't seen you play basketball?" said Steve. "I have been practicing and learning from Coach Hayden Christianssen." "And where can I meet him?" "Well, he's upstairs in the attic." "Let me guess, it's Roger!" "Yes it is. God you're smart. I thought I was gonna give you my handy dandy lie detector machine. God, I have horrible memories with these."

Meanwhile, Stan and Francine are at the fruit and vegitable aisle at a grocery store, at 8:59pm, and they're still shopping. Francine gets bored and says, "Are you gonna look at stuff or are you gonna buy something?" Stan says while looking at the tomato, "This tomato could be a key to our success." "Really?" Stan throws a tomato as her. "Gotcha! Ho ho!" Stan laughed, "you were fooled big time with the best. Shit, if I were you, I'd be looking for more tomatoes." The cashier speaks through the intercom, "The store is now closing. Please buy what you want and then leave." "Oh great," said Stan, "no more tomato looking." "Okay then," said Francine, "let's go!" "Yeah... to the carrot aisle!" Francine groans. "Seriously, how can we leave the store. This grocery store has everything. By god, I'll have to look for more stuff if I were you. So let's stay and search." The lights turn off, and the cashier locks up the store. "So, basically, your plan was to stay all night?" "Francine, yes. We would love to be here in the day, but at night, it gets better every time!" "Yeah, but it's quiet." "Anything from Charlie Chaplin is quiet."

Back at the house, Hayley and Steve go up to the attic, and see Roger (Coach Hayden Christianssen) playing a basketball video game for the Playstation 4. "Use the X button. Use the X button! USE THE GODDAMN X BUTTON! Worthless PS4! Stupid!" groanned Roger. "So, what do you want guys." "Well," said Hayley, "Steve wants to play basketball at Pearl Bailey High School with his team. Could you train him? I'll be the co-trainer." "Okay, but first, smell my ass." Roger laughs. "Okay, I was lying. Smell my foot." Hayley and Steve get confused. "Yeah, let's train."

_**TO BE CONTINUED!...**_

_**(Chapter 2 coming soon...)**_


End file.
